Saturday, January 28, 2012

saturday morning musings

L. Pirate and I got up a little early this morning to let Hubby get a little extra sleep. He sat in his swing (yes, he still fits in and loves his swing) and watched his favorite backyard friends, while I ate a bowl of cereal and browsed Blog Land. I saw no less than four pregnant belly pictures.

All these pregnant pictures remind me that I really do want to have that adventure all over again. I want to feel a baby kick inside me. My baby is still mostly a baby... But he's growing fast and I see these little tiny babies at church and then I just want to hold them, and burry my nose into their neck and smell that baby smell. I want another one. I do. I do.

But Hubby and I? We don't get to decide when these little spirits come to us. We can only do our part and wait on the Lord for the miracle.

And honestly? I feel so ready for another one... but I'm not sure I'm ready to start that "TTC" process all over again. Because believe it or not, though I've got a baby now, just thinking about "TTC" starts to stress me out and become emotional and tired and frustrated...

It's like, I'm looking up at that Terrible Roller Coaster again, knowing that I have to get on it to get what I want... But I'm just not sure I'm ready for that ride again.


wendy said...

You'll know when you are ready.
Sometimes our heart tells us we want something right NOW, but if we stop, pray, and listen....we know that
but not right now

Laurie said...

I hope this roller coaster ride is much shorter for you than last time! :)

Merrilee said...

I sent you a book that might be helpful. It should be arrriving any day now.. the post office told me 1-28. It should be easier the second time around. I sure hope so.