Wednesday, July 6, 2011

i'm not a meth addict, i'm a mother.

You know those commercials targeted to teens, warning them about the results of using meth? I feel like a girl in one of those commercials. Let me explain.

The other day I was at a Thrift Store, it was a particularly bad hair day/ green-beans-on-my-last-clean-shirt kind of a day. The Pirate could have been mistaken for a homeless child with the green beans on his shirt as well, and his wild hair, and bare feet (seriously, it's impossible to keep shoes on that kid)... And I saw a woman eyeing me. I think she was trying to decide if I was a Tweaker or not.

I don't blame her.

I used to look in the mirror and see a {sorta} pretty girl. Now I look in the mirror and I see red, bloodshot eyes hanging over black circles. I see scratches on my face, neck, and arms inflicted by the babe and his "claws of death." And yes, I know I should go ahead and figure out a way to clip those nails of his... only I haven't yet. And I think to myself, Wow. How do all those other moms manage to look so good? And I wonder, Am I ever going to start looking like me again? And When?

In the meantime, Concealer and More Make-Up Than Normal are like my new best friends.

If only I had remembered them that day. Right?

10 comments:

Aunt Merrilee said...

I enjoy your blog entries, always look forward to reading them.. today was no exception. Because I have spend time with you this past year I can just see the picture in my mind of you and the pirate! Things will be better now that you have soome help! Love you.

Rachel Sue said...

Sweetie, you have got to cut yourself some slack. you have just spent the last how many months sans husband? It'll get better.

Kristi said...

I have compared myself to a meth mom before. In that sometimes I find myself dozing on the couch like a drugged up zombie while my kiddos play and fend for themselves around me. Then sometimes I get banged on the head with a book and the cutest little eyes are way too close to my eyes asking me to read to them. Seriously? Can't you see I'm sleeping? Ha ha. Love it. I totally relate.

Kyla said...

I hear ya! I at least have my hair brushed and in a pony tail, (Sometimes I forget the brushed part) and I have my make up system down to 10 mins flat! If nothing else, mascara, blush, and concealer... It is so sad to me that we all judge people for how they look or seem to act, They may just be having one of those days!!

Carrie said...

ONE YEAR. After 1 year you will get into the groove of things, and if you don't by then you can beat yourself up. But not until then;) One YEAR baby. Let it all hang loose!

Malinda said...

I bet you look great! you are your own worst critic! about the finger nail clipping with babies. I always wait until they are asleep and then I clip away.

Tamsyn Spackman said...

I'm lucky- my husband is super critical of long finger nails. He is always clipping our kids nails, lol. Otherwise it wouldn't get done. I can relate to your story. I can't believe how much of a pick-me-up my recent haircut was for me. A neighbor did it, and now my hair is easy to do and I like it. It did so-o-o much to lift my spirits.

Hilary said...

I must say I feel about fourty times better when I have makeup on.
I wish I didn't, but I do. :)

Cara said...

I bite my son's nails and he's nearly 18 months. My husband prefers to clip them but he's half hearted at doing this!

I look like a dis-shelved mess, too. I have NO idea how other mothers look great when they do but my guess is that they let the TV babysit their kids? I think some day I will get myself looking good again and I am working on it now - but it's not my priority, you know?

I also believe that those who look great are wearing 40 layers (minimum) of make up.

[im]perfect mommy said...

Hahaha, this made me laugh out loud, which I completed needed today, drowning in laundry, watching my (still-in-their-pajamas) sons pour copious amounts of rice crispies on my bed. At least I'm not alone.