Monday, November 11, 2013

potty training: it's misery -part two

He wasn't interested any more. Not even a little. He'd go when he wanted some candy, but even the lure of chocolate didn't attract him much. He just wouldn't be bothered by the hassle of having to stop his playtime to go to the toilet. 

So I went to the library and checked out a bunch of how-to books. I read them cover-to-cover within two nights. The books proved to be as helpful as all the other parenting books I've wasted my time reading. Which is: not at all.

Tangent here: Seriously. How many parenting books have you read that were actually helpful??

One book did have one tiny chunk of potty-training wisdom that I thought was golden. It advised me to go buy like 30 little Dollar Store prizes and wrap them up in wrapping paper and keep them in a place where he can see them. Then, every potty success let him choose one potty present. When you go through all the prizes simply collect them from you house, wrap them back up, and start all over again. This is a sure win! I thought.

Initially, it seemed to be. We went through about 23 of those little prizes on the first day -and not one accident. That was also the day we learned our son has the strange ability to go twice in a four minute time frame. He somehow can hold half his bladder, run to open his present, run back to the toilet, and another thirty seconds later  come back for a second present. It'd be funnier if it wasn't so maddening. 

So, night after night I sat on the living room floor re-wrapping dollar store toys. By the end of the week I thought we could pretty much call this potty training business more or less done.

Again. I was wrong.

I'd missed the night of wrapping so the potty-prize basket wasn't very full. Half way through the day the basket was down to two items. As he went to pick his potty present he told me, "I don't want the play-dough." I laughed out loud as he picked up with other present. The last thing in the basket was play-dough. 

About two hours later he wet his pants. He really didn't want the play-dough.

I wanted to scream. 


Laurie said...

I'm sorry, but this made me laugh so hard! These kids are way too smart for their own good!!

jenny said...

Seriously. If I never had to potty train another child, I'd be very content. Bella was potty trained in one week. Summer... well, it took about 4 months. Within that 4-mos period, I took a few pull-up breaks. All I can say is good luck. And don't lose heart. It'll happen... one day. (That's not really encouraging, sorry.)

Cynthia said...

My first attempt with my first child was over in 48 hours - he would not have an accident but he would also not pee in the potty - he would not pee a drop ALL DAY LONG. We would go through two diapers in 20 minutes at bedtime...I wanted to scream! He did eventually get it but I had to wait him and his stubbornness out.